As much fun as it was it certainly hardened my resolve to never move back to a country town - One person (also from the country) asked in a reminiscent tone, "Was it a shed with a sound system and a barrel fire?"
My response was "Yes" but I wasn't pining for the days gone by - I was staving of frostbite from my toes!
The party was a lot of fun, I gave a stellar speech that enticed a lot of laughter - but, by about 10pm it was 4 degrees outside!
In all honesty I don't remember the parties I attended as a horny teenager been quite so cold, but then again when I was 16 I gulped straight Vodka and drank Lemon Ruskis and UDLs because who would drink beer or wine (how far I've come!)
Because this was a pretty big event, so I decided to bring my boyfriend up with me to see where I am from and get a general idea as to why I am so crazy... It all went very well, there was a near miss where he left the room as my dad decided to walk up to me and fart... I believe he was asserting his authority as the dominant male in the household - I'd believe this whole heartedly if he didn't almost have a heart attack watching people run on television, but as it goes he is not that impressive. I guess that is why he farts.
I don't know if anyone else suffers from this, but I get depressed when I see my old techno-phobic parents with better technology than me... Technology that they generally cannot use.
This has become an epidemic.
I have nothing else to add - it's just annoying, it is wasted on them and if they spent that money getting me the giant digital TV and DVD recorder at least it would get used.
Anyway, after this weekend is over - Mum and Dad graciously let my boyfriend and I share a bed even though they are deeply religious! I am deeply in need of a larger bed - as I am dating a bed hog. And! My mother has given me an almighty shock!
Where do I start?
Well I got a call today because mum wants to learn how to delete her internet history - she is either searching for porn at work or running an illegal betting rink, I haven't decided; and she announces, "Oh! I was telling the ladies at the church sewing group about my gay son and how he sings in a choir!"
This should have been the first warning bell... But I pressed on, interested in where this was going.
"Anyway (enter generic old lady name here) told me her daughter has two gay sons! And they both sing in a choir in America, do you know them?"
I avoided the sarcastic comments that could have followed, probably because I was so unbelievably shocked! What else do these ladies talk about?
I'm terrified my next call will consist of, "Mavis has introduced your father and I to SnM, it's GREAT!"
I'm sure that call will never come! But this is the same woman who used to splash us with holy water when we misbehaved... She has come a long way.
Well I'm about to indulge in some dumplings!
It has been a good rant! :P
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